Blog Archives

Beating Your Head Against the Wall

If I told you to run headfirst into a brick wall, would you?  Probably not.  Yet, metaphorically, most of us do it day after day, week after week, year after year.  We repeat the same behaviors, bemoaning the results and expecting different outcomes.  Trapped in miserable relationships and jobs that do not support our needs, we lack the courage to take a leap of faith.  Change is terrifying. We came to terms with our pain and fear that jumping from the frying pan would plunge us into the flame. Taking a chance could be worse than enduring our misery. Pessimistic, we remain stuck, never considering that something better is waiting for us.  Phoenix rose from the ashes with renewed youth and energy.  With determination, we can transform.  Possibilities are limitless.  

If you think that I sound like Pollyanna, I understand. It is difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel, when you cannot see where to take your next step. Change does not happen overnight, but the process can begin immediately. First, listen to your heart.  Where would you like to be in five years?  What career would you like to pursue?  There are online courses, community colleges and training programs that tailor classes around your work schedule.  If you are in an abusive relationship, seek help and counseling.  

Life is packed with disappointments, lessons, loss and sorrow, but also joy, excitement, pleasure and love.  You deserve to be happy.  You were not put on this planet to be a victim.  Take charge and create the life you were meant to live. Only you know what that is.  Enjoy the journey.  Bon Voyage!

Life is Like a Wheel

Life is to Live

“Life is short, and it is here to be lived.” Kate Winslet

I saw this quote today and wanted to share it with you. Many of us follow a rigid schedule, without any room for flexibility. My mother used to say that we get up, go to work, eat, sleep and do it all again, until one day we wake up old and wonder where our lives went. Structure provides direction, but too much of it stifles creativity. We function like robots, neglecting to see. Staring at our phones, we miss the beauty that surrounds. Ear buds block our ability to hear the birds. Attached, we do not relate to real people, including our families. “Friends” are on social media. Most we will never meet.

Below are 5 suggestions to start living, not existing.

  1. Try different routes to work or a different grocery store. Force yourself to think about what you are doing.
  2. Take an unplugged walk before work. Let your senses fill with sight, scents and sound. Feel the sun and breeze on your face.
  3. Plan dinners with family or friends sans electronics. Put phones on “Do Not Disturb.” Listen to what others are saying. Express how you feel.
  4. Take day trips. Get out into nature. Go somewhere you have never been. Listen to various types of music. Expand your mind. Visit museums. Step out of your comfort zone. Try new foods. Do something you have never done.
  5. Make a list of dreams, things you would like to do but put off because you do not have the time or money. Pick one and make it a goal. If you dream of having a yacht, think about other ways to get onto the water, sooner than later. Perhaps a canoe would fill the bill.

A wise woman told me not to wait to afford the big trips, but to build memories with mini adventures. Life is a collection of snapshots. Create moments to remember. Be present and enjoy!

Wasted

How much of your life is wasted, while you play the what if game? 

  • What if I fail?
  • What if I never find my soulmate?
  • What if I don’t get the job?
  • What if all my dreams don’t come true?
  • What if I am abandoned?
  • What if others laugh at me?

Time is a precious commodity. Think of it as currency.  Is your priority to throw it away on negative thoughts? You cannot control what life throws at you, but you determine your response. Many disappointments and closed doors direct you to a better path. Trust that you are loved and supported. Turn off the news and take a walk. Focus on beauty and the arts, whatever feeds your soul. Go with the energetic flow and resist the temptation to swim against the current. Drop the drama. Be grateful in the moment. Inner peace is the reward.

Love or fear, the choice is yours. 

Looking for Love for All the Wrong Reasons

Are you looking for that special someone to make you happy? Are you looking for security, comfort or intimacy? Do you fear being alone, the one in the corner, not picked?

Love is a complicated emotion. Many seek to fill a hole. Whatever the need, the burden is placed on Mr. or Ms. Right for fulfillment.  

The first place to look is within. Do you love yourself, regardless of your perceived flaws? Do you accept who you are? Is your heart open to give and receive love?

Happiness flows from living in the moment with gratitude.  External people or things can only provide temporary elation. Like icing on the cake, they enhance what is already inside.