Category Archives: death
Death is inevitable, the looming reality, that the journey on Earth is temporary. Although we observe the life cycles of all living things, we are devastated by loss and fear our own mortality.
Grief is an emotion that cannot be avoided. The pain is excruciating when loved ones, including pets, transition to the other side. A piece of us dies with them. Functioning like robots, we tend to daily tasks, but our hearts are non-participants.
Psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross developed a theory that we go through five distinct stages of grief after the loss of a loved one: Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally acceptance. I experienced all of these, but some during the five years that my husband fought leukemia. Denial came when he was diagnosed and relapsed from a bone marrow transplant. Bargaining was in the form of prayer during his treatment. Because he was suffering without hope of recovery, I felt acceptance and relief at his transition. Two years later, when time had dulled the illness and treatment nightmares, I was angry because he had left me to navigate life’s challenges alone. The last item is depression. Over the last seven years, I monitored my mood. Was I clinically depressed? No, but I felt a dark cloud overshadowing everything. Nothing felt the same. It was as if a nerve had been snipped from my body. I felt and enjoyed with all my senses, but the intensity was missing.
There is no time limit on grief, but we can take charge to avoid being devoured. Our loved ones are in a place of unconditional love and light. We remain here because there is more learning, growing and loving to do. Regardless of your beliefs concerning perpetual life, while here, you must survive. Reality bites when the loved one’s death puts you into financial hardship. You may have a family to feed, mortgage and other debts. Nobody is going to rush in on a white charger to save you. After the initial shock, there is no time for pity parties or for sitting in the corner to suck your thumb. Moving forward is the only way to survive. The progress may be slow. You may feel like you are slogging knee deep in molasses, with tears gushing from your eyes. The path may seem dark as pitch. Keep going, if only by baby steps.
With time, the journey becomes easier. Set realistic expectations. Become friends with grief. Know that dates, songs, pictures and places may trigger waves of sorrow. Feel and deal with the emotion when it arises. Have a good cry. When the intensity recedes, continue your healing journey.
Love and pamper yourself. Work on mind, body and spirit health. Stay open for signs from your loved ones. I experienced electronic irregularities, coins, feathers, scents, songs on the radio, random memories, a chill, tummy blips, butterflies, dragonflies, birds and ringing bells. Repeating numbers may be messages from the angels. Multiple fours appear to me several times a day. They are on the clock, computer, license plates, receipts and car odometer. Other repeating numbers include my birthday and 1111. Your loved ones reach across the veil to give you comfort and support. Be open to their love. Their vibration is higher than ours. Raise yours to meet them. Deep in sorrow, you will miss the messages.
Grief hurts and is merciless. Struggle through the void. Find joy and be grateful. Beauty surrounds. Open your heart to receive the love.
My path belongs to me
The contract to fulfill
Through Earthly lessons learned
Compassion is my guide
No right have I to judge
Each travels journey planned
Humanity is one.
Gentle spirits hover close
Feathers, pennies, butterflies
Signs from loved ones
Catch the meaning?
Foggy, fuzzy, message be
Gifted wonder, medium
Souls who crossed behind the veil
Love eternal, never dies
Living life with clarity
Thank you, helpers
Infinite wisdom, time and space
Concepts man cannot embrace
Spirits and guides, to you implore
Follow, trust with them explore
Faith in the vastness sight unseen
Purpose, path, what does it mean?
Miracles happen every day
Inward turn, you’ll find your way.
I walk the beach, our favored spot
Searching for my love.
Pink puffs on blue, sun bursting through
Hopes are riding high
Be this the day I see his face
Finding his way back
To hearth and home, his family
Awaiting safe return?
I see a man. He’s coming near
Bursting is my heart
The gait is wrong, the build not his
Smashed to smithereens
The gulls are screaming, “Silly girl.
Spirits walk with God.
You look for him, but cannot see.
Open up your mind.”
“A special date, a butterfly,
Feathers, pennies find
A rainbow stretched across the sky
Messages of love.”
Struggle through the birth canal
The baby fights for life
Tiny lungs that gasp for air
A slap across the butt
Pattern set for human life
It’s cruel and cold sometimes
Fraught with tests and challenges
To teach life’s lessons best
Question not when things are good
Enjoy the respite time
Love will keep your spirit whole
Resilient, strong, inspired
Time to leave will come with death
For most another fight
Struggle through the veil to light
Cross over, job well done!